


Time After Time

by sheepkun



Category: Guardian - Fandom, 镇魂 | Guardian (TV), 镇魂 | Guardian - priest
Genre: AU, By that I mean me using some novel characterization with mainly TV verse, Da Qing is a good kitty fight me, Don't copy to another site, I don't really know - Freeform, M/M, Mix of TV and Novel, Reincarnation, Sort Of, This was plaguing me and I had to, University AU, Ye Zun is a punk rocker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-02
Updated: 2019-12-03
Packaged: 2020-06-03 01:44:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19453792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sheepkun/pseuds/sheepkun
Summary: It seems that no matter how much time goes by, Shen Wei is always fated to remember and Yunlan will always forget.Basically an AUish, spin-off sort of thing that would go on from what happened at the end of the series, where everyone is alive, and well, and in University, but they all still have their memories (well, some of them).





	1. Once Upon a Dream

**Author's Note:**

> I finished Guardian in one sitting after accidentally picking it up with a friend. Forty episodes is a lot for me and my easily distracted self but I sat through it with wide eyes and cried like a baby at the end. And then this plot bunny wouldn't leave me alone, so I went ahead and gave in to it. I apologize in advance for any mistakes in spelling or reference of names, and such things. I'll probably keep Yunlan's blatant novel flirting in simply for the fact that I live for it, but most of their backstory will be the TV one, with a few changes to some characters and plot points perhaps. Ye Zun will show up like once or twice and you will all see my blatant Da Qing favoritism come to life! Anyways, on to the story! Please enjoy this lil' indulgence of mine. (And warning to slight description of like dead birds because...ya' know, cats).

Zhao Yunlan wakes to the sun searing his lids, and Da Qing staring at him from the window sill, a dead bird by his paws and a look of smug contentment in his green eyes.

"Ugh, are you serious?" his hands come to rest over his eyes, groaning quietly.

He doesn't feel quite like dealing with the carcass on his window just yet, choosing instead to roll over in bed just in time for his alarm to start ringing with annoying precision.

He'd been dreaming again. The same dream from many nights before; a purple super nova and the shape of a man that felt so painfully familiar Yunlan always found his heart aching once he woke up. He never slept long enough to listen to the shaping of a promise made between them, and no matter how much he shut his eyes tight, in the hope of succumbing back to sleep, the man's name was gone from his head by the time he was letting out a put-upon puff of morning breath.

"Bad dreams?" he glances at the cat as it pounces onto whatever available dent it can find on the bed, whiskers twitching curiously as it stares at him, unblinking.

"What's it matter to you?" Yunlan huffs, shoving at the cat with a hand and receiving a well deserved scratch on his hand to join his collection.

"It's always the same one. How frustrating!"

His hands mess up his bird's nest hair further as he lets his feet land on the chilled tiles of his cramped apartment, stepping around discarded clothes and digging for a pair that seemed relatively clean from inside the chaos of his drawers.

As usual, he would be going about the day with mismatched socks. He had an odd feeling that Da Qing was the one ruining his pairs simply for the pleasure of watching him go around with polka dots and stripes on his feet.

Not that cats understood anything about fashion, even if said cats could become human.

He steps into the shower, lets it run down his back as he glances at the dirty green of the grout between the tiles as if it'll hold all the answers to the questions that plagued him. He'd already been to more therapists than he could count, too many to bother remembering. None of them ever had an explanation, and when they did, it was never one Zhao Yunlan was satisfied with.

Contrary to what his rebellious looks would drive others to conclude, Zhao Yunlan was intelligent, the sort of intelligent that could land him a job as an investigative policeman or private detective. He aimed to be the latter, not wishing to be tied down by the boggling workings of governmental bureaucracy like his father.

His father seemed to think Yunlan's dreams were a sign of his weak mind, or some other madness. Yunlan could say a lot of things about his father, but none of them would be good. The man tolerated him at most, avoided him at best. The only reason Yunlan had a nice leather couch in his living room was because he had charmed it off the old man's superior during the renovation of their offices. He'd been downright livid the first time he found out Zhao Yunlan had been going to therapy, as if therapy were some sort of illicit activity and not something people sought out for their mental health. Of course, to a man like his father, discussions of things like mental health were just as disturbing as the thought of smoking.

At least Yunlan had given up one of the two.

"At this rate you're going to leave without eating again!"

He startles at Da Qing's voice, filtering along with knock on the door.

Making quick work of drying himself and slipping on to the clothes he'd brought in. A check in the mirror reveals him to be presentable, though as sleep deprived as usual, if the accentuated circles under his eyes are any indication. Quick as mouse, Yunlan digs in the cupboard beneath his sink for the sun cream he keeps hidden behind the hand towels and first-aid kit, lest his friends find out and never let him live it down. As much as he liked to brag about his devilish good looks, he couldn't simply rely on good genes forever; even models used a touch up here or there.

Satisfied that there were no traces left behind, Zhao Yunlan opens the door to Da Qing's familiar and eerily feline face, pushing the nose that comes sniff at his neck away immediately.

"Did you change your cologne?"

"No, fuck off." Da Qing doesn't let this deter him, following Yunlan around the small space like an uncomfortable shadow, making him nearly trip over a pile of books that had been balancing dangerously close the edge of the coffee table. He swears again, sending daggers to Da Qing's innocent expression.

"What do you want?"

"Food."

"They feed you at work, don't they?!" he fumbles under the couch and manages to find his school bag, checking inside for his wallet and keys, Yunlan grabs his phone off the bed side table and moves to the door, trying to shove his feet into his boots without touching the laces.

"Not me! You!" Da Qing grumbles. "I already ate."

Yunlan makes a face as he realizes the bugger's probably referring to the bird head that's still on the windowsill, like a rather tasteless piece of decor.

It surely blended in with the mess that was Yunlan's place.

"I'll feed off the sunlight or something." he deflects. There was nothing in the fridge anyhow.

Not that there ever was. Most of the times Yunlan ordered take-out or promised to stop and grab a bite to eat at one of the cafés near the University. He didn't always keep his promises, and even if Da Qing knew that, there wasn't much he could do, as cat or human.

"Seriously, you have to eat something. I don't want you to go to the hospital again." he insists, and there's something so horribly foreign and sorry about his eyes that Yunlan deflates for a moment, putting down his bravado to reach over and ruffle the head of hair he had grown up seeing.

"I won't, stupid cat."

That's as much comfort as Yunlan will allow himself to offer, and he doesn't bother to wait for Da Qing before going out. The cat doesn't need a copy of the key to go in and out anyhow. Yunlan doubted anyone would be to break in through his 6th story window, and even if they did, they'd have a dammed time trying to find something of value to steal.

Perhaps his couch, but there was no way that would be inconspicuous.

The morning is crisp with winter air as he steps out, watching a blur of dark far pounce out from the apartment to the tree a few meters below. The cat's so heavy the remaining leaves on the tree scatter to the ground, dropping onto Yunlan's back. He doesn't find it in himself to get mad as he climbs on, with smooth, practiced motions. He'd been riding his motorcycle for a near four years already, if counting all the times he'd gone and messed around with the ride of a friend's friend, and two if he was counting the time during which he'd had his license. 

As much as he liked to say he had a bike for coolness factor and "attracting chicks" the truth was that Yunlan had always favored motorcycles for the simple fact that they were cheaper than cars. He'd gotten a license for a car, just in case of course, though he didn't own one. Saving up for his motorcycle while saving up for his own apartment had already been a struggle, adding a car in the equation would have been a nightmare. Yunlan had been lucky that his friend's friend had been willing to give him a good discount, something about feeling bad for Little Yunlan so desperate to break out on his own.

He hadn't been wrong. Yunlan had been desperate to break out on his own, from the moment his mother had died, he had wanted nothing but to live as far as possible from his father. The man had no love for his family, no love for his son, and whatever love he'd had for his wife hadn't been enough to keep her alive. Of course, a part of him was very much aware that he couldn't blame anyone for his mother's illness, but he was certain he could point fingers at the reason why she'd been so sad during her last days.

Shaking himself, Yunlan skirts lazily into the pathways of University, under the shadowy groves of trees leading to the campus parking lot, his stomach protesting in the biting way an empty stomach often did when the acid was dangerously close to corroding its walls.

"Huh, I guess I really should have eaten something."

There was no time for regrets however, seeing as he had five minutes to jog to class in order to make it in time. He could always eat later, if he remembered to.

Which he didn't. It's only when he's halfway back, going around the main building and searching for where he's parked his bike, that his debonair attitude catches up to him in the form of a piercing pain in his abdomen. Yunlan grits his teeth, somehow trying to will his stomach into behaving itself all the while cursing himself at not having the hindsight to have brought along his medication. He didn't need to eat if he had his medication, no matter if the doctor had stated otherwise.

He's bending down and folding in half before he can really stop himself, trying to get the cold air to soothe the fire. There was no way he could ride home in his condition. He should have felt it coming, or rather, he shouldn't have ignored it. But he only ever thought that way while in pain, he was sure once the pain went away he'd be back to brushing off the reflux like it had never happened.

Da Qing would be disappointed.

"Ah...damn it."

"Are you alright?" Yunlan startles at the hand that lands on his back, but he's too weak to fight it off as he would, merely flinching away and landing on his bum in a heap that's hardly elegant.

He blinks. The young man regarding him is frightfully beautiful, his lashes long even behind his round glasses. Yunlan's already dry lips turn prickly, and he fights down the flush that would have manifested at being caught so off guard by someone so good looking, manages to put on a grin that probably looks ghastly, before it's taken over by a grimace as his arms wind around his ribs again.

"Just, a bit of a health issue. I'll be fine." he notes, quickly, trying to wave the well intentioned fellow away. Of course, as most well intentioned people, he doesn't get the memo, merely hovers closer.

"I'll take you to the nurse."

"No nurse!" Yunlan protests. "I have medication at home. I just need a moment. Just a moment." his breath shutters out, and he lets himself be manhandled into a better sitting position on the curb, blinking as a body settles next to his, and a shadow falls over his head.

Yunlan almost wants to laugh at the absurdity of the guy holding his messenger bag over Yunlan's head as if to shield him from the woeful powers of the November sun. He doesn't manage to laugh, as something about the stranger's profile gives him pause, and he stares, numbed through the pain at that face, blatantly disregarding any rules of basic decency because he feels like this is someone he knows. The more he stares, the more it sinks in. He feels it right down to his core to the point that it shakes him more than the ulcers trying to maim him.

Yunlan knows he must look a gaping fish, but he can't get his mouth to click shut.

He wants to ask if they've met before. He knows they haven't. He's good at remembering faces, and this is one he can't recall. He can't recall it yet it's just as nostalgic as seeing framed photos of family members.

"Does it hurt that much?"

"W-what?"

The other's face is bordering on almost fierce, frightened concern. "You're crying." he notes, swallowing and pointing to Yunlan's cheeks, one hand hovering as if wondering whether wiping Yunlan's tears would get him a broken wrist.

"Oh." Yunlan looks away quickly. "Sorry. It's okay."

He takes the handkerchief that's given to him, wonders who even uses handkerchiefs in their day and age, dabs it against his face before letting out a strained, wheezy push of air.

"I should get home."

Those fingers finally grasp out, pulling him back by a sleeve. "You look pale, you shouldn't. Is there anyone you can call?"

"Just my cat, but he's out now." Yunlan says, realizing that such an answer will come off as crazy to anyone who doesn't know Da Qing.

"Then I'll-" Yunlan finally does chuckle, letting it die naturally into a whimper. "I'm sorry to say this pal, but you don't look like the type who knows the first thing about motorcycles."

The man deflates so quickly Yunlan almost feels guilty, and he's about to say something when those eyes land on him with unsettling determination.

"No, but my brother does." he shoves his bag onto Yunlan's arms. "Stay here, I'm going to get him."

"Wai-"

The guy's turning a corner with surprising speed for a scholarly sort, disappearing before Yunlan can even finish his sentence. He tries not to think about how utterly cunning and irresponsible it had been to leave his bag behind in Yunlan's hands, leaving him no choice but to stay put and look after it. Though if Yunlan had been the sort to have ill intentions, this would have been a perfect opportunity. As it was, his naughty nature was deeply subdued by the pain that was progressively worse the more he thought about it, and he did nothing but hug the bag to his stomach, feeling sweat bead at his forehead as footsteps finally approached again.

"There he is, can you take him home, Ye Zun?"

Yunlan doesn't bother looking up from his very comfortable fetal position. Looking at the pretty boy again will only make his heart clench in the strange way, and he has enough muscles clenching as it is.

He lets his keys be coaxed out of him, lets the duo place him securely on his bike, his arms coming to circle around an unfamiliar waist and leather jacket in a style very similar to his own. Vaguely, Yunlan thinks this could be some very complex kidnapping and he's about to warn off trying to coax his father for a ransom only for the shaking of the motor to make him want to puke. He shuts up, lets things happen instead. If he dies, it'll at least be in the hands of a beauty. At least he supposes the beautiful stranger's brother must be just as dashing.

Yunlan doesn't ask how Mr. Brother, Ye Zun, if he wasn't mistaken, manages to find his home. He's just too relieved at the thought of his bed and the medication that would knock him out being just a few floors away.

Ye Zun, who turns out to be the punk twin of Mr. Beauty, leads him to the elevator, not heeding to Yunlan's protests of being able to get by on his own. His hair is tied as a distracting little bun near his nape, and Yunlan entertains himself with staring at it for the duration of the elevator ride.

"It's here, it's here. You can let go now." he'd never been so happy to return to his personal hurricane.

He leans heavily against the door once the support is gone, unlocking it with trembling limbs and turning to give his savior, and not kidnapper a smile.

"Thanks, Ye Zun, right?"

That earns him a smile in return, one that's sharp and sort of cocky. The sort of smile a man who's aware of his own charms wears. If Yunlan had been in a better mindset he'd already be flirting, yet the words that leave him are as genuine as anyone will ever see him being.

"I feel like, I've met you before..."

"Who knows." Ye Zun conceeds, and it's hard to tell if he agrees or not, but there's something strangely gentle about him that shouldn't really be there. "Just get in and take care of yourself."

"Okay."

Once Yunlan hits the bed, after hot tea and at least three variations of pills, he doesn't dream of anything. Not even of pretty siblings that somehow seem to know his exact address.


	2. First Meeting

"Get off me!"

Zhao Yunlan pushes a ball of fur off his face and out of his bed, staring a the ceiling of his bedroom with a thoroughly disgruntled expression at being woken up. It takes a moment of persistent, pitiful meowing for him to eventually sigh, long and hard, moving over and patting the space next to him.

The cat bounces up with surprising agility, round green eyes satisfied as it decides to rub against Yunlan's shoulder.

"Why do you insist on waking me up before my alarm rings, huh?"

There's a shimmer of air; where there had been a cat is a man with the very same bell collar hung around his neck.

"Because you always put it on snooze." A wet snuffle. "And you slept for so long I thought you were dead!"

Yunlan grumbles something that sounds like 'shitty Dead-Cat' under his breath, before rolling on his side and ignoring the pawing of Da Qing's very human hands on his arm.

"Yunlaan..." he breathes and shuts his eyes firmly.

He can feel the remnants of his stomach's failings in the sour taste in his mouth. It makes him queasy, though hardly enough to warrant standing. He still hurts, body and soul. The events from before are oddly blurred in his mind but the pull of his heart still rings with clear nostalgia. Yunlan knows it hadn't been just the woes of a pretty face luring him in; he was a man that appreciated aesthetics yet was never overcome by them. Yunlan had not, in his whole short, miserable life, ever seen any single person so beautiful he started crying. Those tears, those feelings, had been something else entirely, something he was too put off to pinpoint.

"Yunlan?" the whining extends, turns concerned. "You wouldn't wake up. I almost called the hospital again."

Yunlan doesn't move. He hears the unspoken question, reaches out blindly until he touches that must be Da Qing's head, smoothing it with careless motions.

"It was the medication, you useless cat. There's no way I plan on dying and leaving you alone."

Da Qing huffs, a quiet sound. "Please! I'm a great cat that has lived for many years! I don't need a human's pity!"

It's a lie. Told for Yunlan's comfort, and he appreciates it, blatant as it is. His chest warms with the underlining of affection for his ever present companion, and it's enough to help him push away the phantoms still clinging to him as he finally gets up.

Outside, the sky is light. His phone is dead but if the clock on the wall can be trusted, it's way past the time to arrive for morning classes.

"Hey, get dressed. We're going out to eat."

"I'm always dressed." Da Qing rebukes, unhelpful as usual, shuffling around before grabbing a change of clothes for Yunlan. " _You_ get dressed. And shower, you stink!"

"That's just your oversensitive nose talking." Yunlan defends, making a line for the bathroom anyhow. It wouldn't do to not at least smell nice in the case he met someone while out.

He's glad for the shower, it makes him feels less dead in a way nothing else probably would. Shoving bodily into slippers and uncaring of the cold, Yunlan waves for Da Qing to head out the door, biting his lip to curb the sudden urge for a smoke that rattled through him.

After quitting therapy, Yunlan had decided to quit smoking as well. Mainly because the hospital had ordered him to, partly because he wanted his father to see that he was quite capable of things when he put his mind to it. Of course, therapy hadn't been ditched to prove a point per se, though Yunlan liked to say so. He'd stopped going because he'd stopped being able to afford it. Or perhaps, he'd stopped caring about himself enough to keep trying. Maybe he had gotten tired of pushing himself to go the extra mile to the clinic.

Whatever the reason, whatever the _real_ reason, it had had nothing to do with his father. But he liked to pretend it did. He liked it when the old man, in the rare occasions he came by to "check in", would see Yunlan's living state and his bottles of medication and a bit of his brow would furrow. He probably didn't care enough about Yunlan for that furrow to be guilt, but it was close enough to satisfy him.

"What do you feel like having?" he asks, hands in his pockets as Da Qing bounces after him.

"Fish!"

"No." Yunlan sighs, lips twitching with the itch to have anything between them. He'd have to swing over to the nearby convenience store and restock.

"Soup?"

"Ah, that works."

They stop at an auntie just off their street, curling their hands around warm serving and settling on the rickety benches placed under a tarp.

The broth goes down smooth and settles undemanding in Yunlan's stomach. It's such a relief he finishes the whole thing and orders fish for Da Qing, whose eyes light up like Yunlan's on payday.

"Don't you have work today?"

"Afternoon." the cat explains, around a mouthful. "Didn't you have class?"

"Yes, and then work. But I'm too tired for both so I've decided to sacrifice my education for money."

Da Qing rolls his eyes, wiping oily hands on his overalls as he trudges after Yunlan into the convenience store, staring around with the boundless curiosity he possesses for colorful packaging.

"You technically don't have to work. I make enough for both of us."

"Yes, for your own use."

"I'm a cat! Cats don't use money!" he starts grabbing all the fish flavored snacks off a shelf as if to oppose his own statement. "As long as you feed me and let me stay with you, I don't need anything else."

Yunlan pauses, putting down the packet of strawberry and vanilla flavor he'd been debating over. His throat is constricting in an odd way he knows all too well, and Yunlan lets his face soften for a mere moment, reaching out to pull Da Qing into a choke-hold hug.

"Save up for my hospital bills then."

"Your dad always pays those."

"I'd rather he didn't."

Da Qing nods, as if Yunlan were making perfect sense and not just being petty.

There were moments he truly had to wonder how the cat's mind worked, what with the way he'd agree with senseless things and disagree with what seemed sensible. Either way, Yunlan's rather thankful for it. Da Qing had been with him for as long as he could remember, right down to those haunting moments by his mother's bedside. The first time he'd morphed from cat to human, ten year old Yunlan hadn't even found it in himself to feel that shocked; after all, Da Qing the cat had been talking to him from the day Yunlan had learned to utter his first word. 

"Are you buying or not?"

Yunlan looks up, he must be smiling somehow, because Da Qing smiles back in that awkward way he does when he's not certain about what Yunlan's thinking, before grabbing the assorted flavors pack from his arms, the type that came mainly with terrible flavors like melon and lemon, all mellow and not sweet enough.

Still, it's better than nothing, and Yunlan's happy to finally have something to distract himself with, the clacking of the candy against his teeth a comfort as he breathes deep, sandals shuffling on asphalt while Da Qing carries back all their snacks.

The morning slips by, lazy, and the dozing cat that had been purring on Yunlan's lap for a good part of it wakes to go off to his job like some responsible adult, reminding Yunlan to get ready for his own, as if Yunlan were the child of the two.

He grabs his bag, the one that was usually left under his bed and not under the couch, pushes his feet into his usual boots, socks mismatched blue and a disturbing mustard yellow, and leaves with his keys jingling around a finger.

Despite his ambitions, Yunlan did not have some prodigious job as a consultant or P.I. He didn't have a terribly droll job at an office or restaurant either.

He worked as a tutor, something he'd been doing since High School. It paid well, had decent hours, and allowed him a flexible schedule.

Obviously, nobody would peg him as a tutor, let alone a good teacher, looking at his shit-eating grin, but he had people he'd been doing business with for years, and they always spread around a nice word for him.

'Don't mind his looks, Yunlan's sharp.'

It helped that Yunlan genuinely liked kids. They were mostly honest and always eager to behave as long as Yunlan offered to share his stash of lollipops.

"Little Guo! I'm here!"

Guo Changcheng was Yunlan's last kid for the day. He was an easily frightened teen, polite to the point of being unnerving. His aunt and uncle were great people despite being officials, though Yunlan didn't let that cloud his judgement.

He helped Guo with Math, though he was aware that the poor sort needed help with just about every subject, and there were some he wasn't qualified to help with. He had never been a humanities sort despite being good with people, he supposed the two things didn't have to be related especially since Yunlan simply didn't have the patience for things like Philosophy and Art History. It was fortunate for Little Guo that his family had money to throw around.

"Did you finish those exercises I gave you?"

He asks, sitting across Changcheng after having greeted his aunt, who was the only one home.

"Y-yes!" Changcheng pulls out a stack of papers with trembling hands, carefully pushing them towards Yunlan, with the sort of fearful admiration he always seemed to have.

They go over mistakes, which aren't many. Yunlan tells Changcheng he's getting better, which drives the boy to near tears. They talk a little, between Yunlan's corrections and the pen's scritch-scratching. He always had something he wanted advice with. Currently, it was his moody, brooding project partner. The tale made Yunlan wonder if Little Guo ever caught a break; the guy seemed like a jerk. Or perhaps he just had a crush. Of course, that suggestion makes Changcheng turn a scandalized pink and forces Yunlan to drop the subject.

There's more work assigned, conversation lulls and the two hours are up with the sound of Changcheng's aunt tugging open the door of the study.

"Will you stay for tea?"

Yunlan grins, easy and enchanting. "I can't trouble you anymore, and I've got someone waiting at home.

"Oh! Zhao Yunlan! You've found a girl?"

He laughs as she swats his arm gently. "None of that. It's my cat, my cat."

She chortles at this, good natured, as if she'd known all along. "At least take some cake back with you. My husband doesn't really like sweets but I know you do."

Changcheng is leading him outside before Yunlan can protest, and he can only watch as the woman slips into the kitchen.

It's quiet, until there's the crunch of gravel up the walkway. Little Guo looks up.

"Teacher Shen!"

"Hello, Changcheng." a moment's pause. "Ah-"

Yunlan turns, chest sinking with an inexplicable feeling as Mr. Beauty stares straight at and through him.

"Hey," he raises a lazy hand in greeting, lips quirking up in a strained half-smile. "Come here often?"

A laugh, crinkling eyes. Yunlan feels some odd sense of achievement at having garnered such a reaction.

"I tutor Changcheng. I suppose you do too?"

"Yes! This is teacher Zhao Yunlan."

"Shen Wei, it's a pleasure." 

Where had he heard that name before?

Yunlan stares at the hand, grips it. He holds on for too long or maybe it is Shen Wei that doesn't let go, whoever is to blame, they linger long enough for Guo's aunt to return, clearing her throat in a way that's just a little too pointedly loud.

"I should go. I'm glad to see you're better, Yunlan."

Yunlan doesn't know what face he makes at the sound of his name, merely nods a little helplessly as Shen Wei bows out to go inside with Changcheng, leaving him staring foolishly with a container of cake in his hand.

"He's quite handsome, isn't he?"

"W-what? Oh, I mean. Yes. Though not as handsome as me."

Changcheng's aunt laughs, liberally, before shaking her head. "Go on home before your cat gets mad at you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another meeting! I was so excited writing this. I love Da Qing with my whole heart and how he cares for Yunlan. Alas! In the novel, it feels like Yunlan's sort of 'empty' and a bit on the 'depressed' side, which I felt didn't transfer as much to the series so if Yunlan seems a tad more melancholy, that's why. Again I apologize for any mistakes in regards to names or honorifics, I did my research and tried to be close to what I got in the drama, but if anyone wants to point out anything, please let me know! Thank you for reading!


	3. Call Me Maybe

"Little Zhao, you really ought to take better care of yourself. At this rate you'll have an old man's stomach before you're thirty."

Da Qing had told on him to Zhu Hong, who had forced Lin Jing to bring him to the doctor, who had told Yunlan's father he was sick again, which resulted in Yunlan having all his medical expenses paid for again. He resisted the urge to throw the new pills on the ground simply because he couldn't find it in himself to throw a tantrum with so many people present.

"I will. I promise."

The doctor smiles, friendly and wrinkled, like he's well aware of Yunlan's bluff.

"At least remember to take these regularly, and if you're not going to have proper meals try not to let your stomach run on empty."

"Stock up on dried fish!" Da Qing suggests, unhelpful.

Yunlan hisses at him to shush, giving the doctor a charming grin.

"Of course. Trust me doc, you won't see me here for another...6 months!"

Doctor Bai laughs, before leading him out, with another stern reminder about having meals and drinking water and cutting back on sugar. Apparently too much glucose was bad for the stomach, and it could make you diabetic.

Yunlan knew this, there was no way he didn't know. He just didn't think he cared enough to heed the numerous warnings. It was probably a mix of self-hatred along with a dose of invincibility syndrome that came with still being young; Yunlan had the notion that his body could at some point fail him, it just didn't seem likely enough for him to mind. As long as his brain was in working order, everything else was inconsequential. Or something like that.

"Zhu Hong told me to take you grocery shopping." Lin Jing notes, casually pulling Yunlan by the collar as soon as they're out in the hall.

"What are you, Zhu Hong's henchman?"

"Well, she's my boss." Yunlan let's himself be dragged along, feeling too contrary to contribute and too tired to put up a fight. He'd had a hell of a few days kicking himself for not getting Shen Wei's number and trying to finish all the essays he had due in one night. His friends, which were more like the fussiest found family ever, could be even more stubborn than Yunlan himself and despite the fact that he was more than willing to go against every single one of his father's wishes, Yunlan found it a little harder to disappoint his friends. Especially Zhu Hong; the woman could guilt trip an unsuspecting victim like it was no one's business.

The grocery store is, thankfully, empty. Most of the population does not do their groceries on Friday afternoons, especially near dusk, when they could be out getting wasted. Lin Jing pushes a cart onto Yunlan's hands, then shoves his face against his phone and proceeds to ignore him. Da Qing scurries off to the snack aisle, like he's hot on a prey's tail, acting as if they don't already only live off snacks back at the apartment.

It leaves Yunlan to stare around rather helplessly at a place he rarely visits. Most of his trips to the grocery store, the vivid, real ones, had been with his mother. She'd carefully pick ingredients, either letting him help or teaching him how to choose the best ones.

Yunlan could no longer recall any of her tips, but as he strolls down the produce section, he thinks of his mom smiling at him as he suggest what they should have for dinner, and it gives him enough pause that he thinks about at least getting a few pears. His mom wouldn't have been happy with him not worrying for his health; not that it mattered, since she wasn't around. He could pretend though, for a moment.

"That's not ripe, you have to check the ridges." Yunlan drops the melon he had been inspecting. It rolls away, rather anti-climactically and stops by Lin Jin's feet. The bastard doesn't even bother picking it up, merely toeing it back and leaving Yunlan to try and get it without fumbling too much.

"Sorry, did I startle you?"

"No! No! Your good looks did." Yunlan deadpans, lips twitching as he apologetically places the fruit back. Shen Wei flushes lightly, though his brows furrow in what's clearly disapproval as he shakes his head.

"Nonsense. I'm sorry about the sudden approach, I just caught sigh of you and..." he trails off on the thought, gaze straying and Yunlan wants to ask him to finish it, the words clambering up his throat. "Weren't you better?"

"What?"

"Your stomach." there's blatant concern on the chiseled features, too much for Yunlan to play off. "You seemed alright..."

"I am," Yunlan clears up quickly, hands out.

"It's just that you've got..." he points to the brown bag with the hospital logo in Yunlan's cart.

"That? Don't worry! I just made him go to the doctor for a check-up! This guy here got a biiiig scolding. You know he's been hospitalized twice? I don't understand why humans have such frail bodies."

Da Qing bounces into the conversation with all the fluidity of a sneaky cat, having returned from his hoarding without Yunlan's notice. He drops the bags upon bags into the cart, smug, before turning to Yunlan's conversation partner like they're old friends.

"I'm Da Qing! I'm Yunlan's owner." Yunlan snaps out of his haze enough to slap Da Qing upside the head and grouse at him to shut his mouth. Shen Wei introduces himself, unfazed by Da Qing's deplorable behavior while reaching out a smoooth hand for handshake. Yunlan almost wants to take the hand for himself, but thinks better of it, instead shoving his thumbs into his pockets as Shen Wei smiles at him, with a sort of benevolent patronization that makes him press his lips together tighter.

"Is he your roommate?"

"Something like that." Yunlan evades, glaring a warning at Da Qing before he can get ides."Hey, I still haven't thanked you for last time. How about dinner? You should bring your brother, Ye Zun, right?"

Da Qing mutters something along the line of 'shameless' just as Shen Wei's expression flits quickly through something that almost seems pained.

"I'm afraid my brother isn't always in town, but he should be around next weekend, if that's okay with you?"

"Perfect." Yunlan nods, a smidgen too enthusiastically. He's ridiculously glad Shen Wei hadn't turned him down, still riding on the odds of the two of them bumping into each other on a Friday, in a grocery store of all places. It was almost too much to be a coincidence, though there was nothing else it could be.

Even with Da Qing in the way, Yunlan ropes Shen Wei into conversation, though a part of him thinks the other had let himself be roped. He chooses to peg that on his tendency to overanalyze things despite his readings of people being rarely wrong. With a bit of coaxing, he learns that Shen Wei is a Liberal Arts major, on his last year before attempting his Master's. He learns Ye Zun's his 'older' twin, who'd inherited the family company in Shen Wei's place. He learns that Shen Wei lives alone, and that he's seemingly much more interested in hearing Yunlan talk than talking about himself despite willingly answering every bit of Yunlan's prying with near gusto. Yunlan supposes it's because he's one of those overwhelmingly considerate sorts, and not because he somehow feels a connection with Yunlan too.

That would be flattering himself too much, even to his standards.

"Do you want a lift? Brother Lin has his car."

"Oh, I wouldn't want to impose." Shen Wei shuffles his bags onto a toned arm. Yunlan chortles, because he's never heard anyone their age saying things like 'impose' so seriously.

"Nah, he doesn't mind. Right, bro?" Lin Jing finally looks up, thought Yunlan knows he's been listening the whole time. He'd probably be getting a text from Zhu Hong later.

"I don't. Come on."

The ride's quiet. Yunlan muses over the melon in his shopping bag and Da Qing chews on dried squid in the front seat while Shen Wei leaves an obvious amount of space between their legs in the backseat, his limbs resolutely settled in his own bubble.

"Ah, we're here." Yunlan unclips his belt before he can. Their fingers brush, subtle yet starling. Yunlan feels like he has to reach out the rest of the way. Thankfully, he resists merely returning Shen Wei's awkward, simmering expression.

"Thank you for the ride, Mr. Lin. Goodbye, Da Qing." their eyes meet through the window.

"Yunlan." Yunlan's chest flips.

"Bye."

It's half-way home when Yunlan slams his hand down on the car seat in order to not slap himself. "I didn't get his number again!"

Lin Jing laughs, like the devil he is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yunlan is good at flirting but he's also bad at flirting, if that's even what he's attempting. Ye Zun will make another appearence soon, he might even have a bigger part in all this than I had planned (the nasty drama man has a mind of his own) but it'll be fun! Thanks for all the comments and kudos and overall support! It makes me super happy and super stoked to keep writing this indulgence !


	4. I don't know you well but I know that Look

He's easy enough to spot, posture relaxed with his hands shoved deep in his pockets, staring up at the books with the lack of commitment of one who wasn't really interested in them.

"Hey,"

Zhao Yunlan stares over his shoulder, his stare vague with a light of recognition before a debonair smile overtakes his features.

"Hi,"

"How're you doing?"

Yunlan's brows rise on his face, smile morphing into a smirk. "That depends, are you trying to pick me up?"

Ye Zun's expressions turns dangerous, his arm resting on the shelf, head tilted. He'd always liked Yunlan. Even when he'd "hated" him, there had been an inexplicable allure to him that he hadn't been able to explain.

Perhaps he and Shen Wei shared more than just a face, it was really the only excuse he could come up with. Zhao Yunlan had certainly been good looking; he still was, maybe more so with his jovial face.

There was a near innocent appeal to it that Ye Zun found quite attractive.

Truly, if it weren't for his brother's near millennial pining he'd certainly have come onto Zhao Yunlan. As it were...

"Not this time, sorry babe." Yunlan shakes his head, too amused to be disappointed. "It's fancy seeing you here."

"I study nearby." there's teasing sarcasm there. "And you?"

"I was checking in on my little bro."

Yunlan's eyes light up, puppy like. Ye Zun blinks, suddenly taken back.

"Shen Wei? Is he here?"

"No. He's in class...what did you want with him?"

"His number." Yunlan sighs, rather put upon. "I keep forgetting to ask for it every time we bump into each other and I wanted to invite the two of you to dinner."

"Oh? And you accused me of flirting?" Ye Zun grins again. Just because he planned on respecting his brother's near obsession with Zhao Yunlan didn't mean he wasn't going to have some fun. "You can have mine."

"Can I?" Yunlan seems too relieved to really catch onto the implications, or maybe he does catch on and does not care. It's hard to tell with him.

He hands over his phone easily, already open on the contact's list.

Ye Zun puts in his name with a small devil emoji next to it, preening when it makes Yunlan laugh, a real laugh.

It's fetching.

"I've sent you a text. Add mine in too."

"Alright." Ye Zun hesitates for a moment as Yunlan turns back to the shelf. He's killing time. There's nothing to do while waiting around for Shen Wei and it's not like taking the opportunity to actively get to know Yunlan through first hand experience would be an issue. He's aware he's making loopholes for himself as he speaks. "How about coffee?"

"Huh? No way."

He blinks. Outright rejection, it was almost appalling.

"My doctor says I'm not allowed coffee anymore." Yunlan sounds woeful. "I'm in for tea and a bite though."

Ye Zun nods, since his vocal chords seem to have wound up around themselves, startled by the satisfaction he feels curl in his chest. 

"Perfect."

Yunlan's amazingly easy company. Ye Zun had known from day one back years ago that they were bound to have quite a lot in common. Even their leather jackets seemed to be a near match.

They talk for hours; not business, not romance, the kind of easy talk had between friends, conversation the likes of which Ye Zun only ever really had with Shen Wei in the privacy of one of their homes. It was a welcome change of pace. Despite his popularity Ye Zun didn't have much in the way of friends. He was well aware he wasn't easy to deal with, nor was he so trusting.

He was not like his brother, who seemed to be just about ready to believe inthe good of all humanity, and who simply didn't have many friends because he didn't make an effort to do so. Ye Zun was open, but only just enough to draw people close without ever letting them in.

He always wore a mask, yet he could feel it slipping. Yunlan asked about his work with only polite interest, clearly uncaring of his money or status. Yunlan's only reason for talking to him was probably because he was Shen Wei's brother, at least, that was what Ye Zun kept imagining in order to spare himself the embarrassment of growing more fond too quickly.

"That was fun."

He sounds like he means it. Ye Zun's heart does something stupid that it's not supposed to.

"I'll be around this weekend too. We can have dinner then."

"Yeah?"

"I'll tell Shen Wei."

Yunlan grins, stares up at the sky. "I'll pay the bill then." he notes, glancing back at the café behind them. Ye Zun chuckles.

"We'll see." he hesitates for a moment, on his way to the car. Yunlan tilts his head, curious. "Nothing. See you soon."

He gets a wave, that grows smaller and smaller on the rearview mirror as he drives away to pick up his brother.

"Where were you?" is the first thing out of Shen Wei's mouth.

Ye Zun shrugs, watches his sibling grown exasperated.

"I was with Zhao Yunlan." he says, once Shen Wei gets in the passenger seat.

"You were?" there's only the vaguest inflection in his tone, and Ye Zun just about resists rolling his eyes behind his shades.

"Yeah. You're lucky. He's pretty great."

Ye Zun pulls out to the road, staring ahead and ignoring the weight of Shen Wei's eyes on him.

"We don't know...if he...if he'll like me."

"Of _course_ he will! Who wouldn't like you?" Ye Zun doesn't mean to sound bitter, flinches as he does so anyways. He'd meant to encourage Shen Wei not incriminate himself further.

"Ye Zun. You're free to like him, you know? I'm satisfied if Yunlan is happy."

"Get out of here with your self-sacrificial bull, Shen Wei." he grumbles, with a little more force than necessary, grabbing his phone from his front pocket and throwing it at his brother's lap.

"Text him and schedule our dinner. Though what it's for, I've yet to really grasp."

"He wanted to thank us. For helping him that time." Shen Wei sounds terribly tender as he stares at Yunlan's contact information.

Ye Zun lets out a long, frustrated breath.

His sibling was disgustingly smitten, it was annoying that he'd be so willing to step aside in the hypothetical scenario of Ye Zun coming to like the very same man he'd loved for nearly forever.

It made him want to lash out, see how far he could push Shen Wei despite having convinced himself he'd be better, do better, this time around. It's hard to tell if he's really lashing out at Shen Wei's wishy-washy attitude or his own.

He texts Yunlan the next day, with surprisingly zero ulterior motive. He'd simply been staring at his reflection in the mirror, with the stifling tie and his hair slicked back and it had made him think of how Zhao Yunlan would probably have laughed at the image, his real life that crinkled his eyes.

That wasn't something he should even be entertaining, but he can't help smiling as he gets a text back rather quickly, and somehow the prospect of their dinner has him more excited than he'd thought possible.

_That doesn't suit you at all!_

_Shut up. Let's hang out again sometime._

_Sure. Just let me know. ;)_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to use songs as the titles for the chapters in this fic and it's turning out to be quite the musical journey. Anyways, Ye Zun's back. Not by particularly popular demand but because once again he is going to get the plot going. Also, he and Yunlan really do and did have the potential to get along quite well... (I feel I've said this already, alas). Whether Ye Zun truly likes Yunlan or not is really up in the air, I've got a few more chapters ready to be edited, so once I've got the time I'll put them up! Please enjoy and thank you for reading!


	5. Signalize

Yunlan's asleep. Head pillowed in his arms, bangs hanging in a mess over his forehead.

Shen Wei breathes, a stuttered sound that hangs in the back of his throat, staring rather helplessly.

"I hope you know, that from an outsider's perspective, what you're doing is...super creepy."

He clears his throat, coughs, pushing up his glasses as his brother gives a snarky, self-satisfied laugh, before moving up behind Yunlan. Shen Wei's about to warn him off startling the other, but Ye Zun merely budges the bony shoulders with careful movements, coaxing him carefully out of the warm doze under the sun.

Yunlan smiles, and while still clouded with exhaustion it's soft and fuzzy around the edges, making Shen Wei's already baited breath slip further back into his lungs, chest squeezing painfully.

"Oh, hey."

"Hey, yourself. Did we make you wait long?"

Yunlan shakes his head quickly, rubbing at his eyes with his knuckles in a way that was so alarmingly endearing Shen Wei had to grip the back of chair to keep his knees from buckling.

Ye Zun smirks like the devil, mouthing a very satisfied 'You're whipped' while rubbing Yunlan's locks like he had any right do so.

"No, I just..." he shrugs, chuckles self-depreciating.

"If you're too tired, we can reschedule." Shen Wei says quickly, once he finds his voice.

Yunlan blinks at him, looking almost affronted at the suggestion.

"You said Ye Zun's not always in town right? We're going. I made reservations and everything."

Shen Wei's stomach sinks, and he can only hope Yunlan hasn't gone and spent more than he can on the two of them. They were hardly worth it, and he was more than aware of how far Yunlan could go when it came to attempting to impress others.

Shen Wei could wish he'd gotten slightly more responsible with each new life, though it seemed highly unlikely.

"Reservations? Sounds expensive."

Ye Zun manifests Shen Wei's concern, sounding more amused than worried.

"Nah, it's at a friend's restaurant." Yunlan rises, grabbing his jacket and grinning. "Shall we get going?"

"Sure. Were you thinking cab or...?"

Yunlan motions to his helmet, and the twinkle in his eye is both nostalgic and unnerving ."I was thinking I'd give Mr. Shen Wei the pleasure of a ride with me. You've already got your bike, right?"

Ye Zun nods, trying and failing to hide the twitch of his lips as he passes by Shen Wei, clapping his shoulder as he leans in to whisper.

"Try not to cop too much of a feel, alright bro?"

Shen Wei splutters, rears after his sibling only for Yunlan to glance at him, tugging gently at the edge of his coat's sleeve.

"If you're not comfortable with it, we can call a cab. I just don't have a car and I assumed since-"

"It's fine." Shen Wei interrupts, because he hates the vaguely veiled dejection on Yunlan's face, and he hates that he put it there; he hates what direct contact with those puppy-eyes does to his heart. "My brother just likes to tease me."

Yunlan beams, positively beams, handing Shen Wei his own helmet while listing off instructions one after the other. Shen Wei doesn't mention that he _has_ gotten rides on his brother's motorcycle before, too intent on listening to Yunlan's carefully laid rules. It doesn't count as lying if he's merely omitting, anyhow.

They settle in, and he keeps his hands carefully settled on the spokes next to him, only moving when Yunlan tugs them around his middle and urges him to 'hold tight' in a croak that's utterly indecent for any place that's not the bedroom. Shen Wei keeps his imagination in check and thanks the heavens for the barrier of the helmet, keeping him from simply burrowing his head into Yunlan's exposed neck; he wouldn't be able to keep his teeth to himself if the access to the skin there had been unfettered

Somehow, they make it to the restaurant; safe and sound, in a ride that had been much more pleasant when compared with Ye Zun's thrill seeking. Yunlan drove with experience and an odd regard for traffic safety rules that made Shen Wei's already abundant fondness grow exponentially, and it seemed to be more habitual than for show; as if this younger, more vulnerable Yunlan was strangely more careful than his older counterpart had been.

Shen Wei doesn't get too distracted by the feel of Yunlan under him, or Yunlan silently hanging by his side in a constant offer of body heat as they head inside the cozy atmosphere of the restaurant, or Yunlan's shoulder squeezed in next to his in the small corner booth.

They order, and every waiter and staff of the place seems to know who Zhao Yunlan is with varying levels of intimacy, to the point that Ye Zun bursts out laughing at the absurdity of it while Yunlan grins, in that cheeky, embarrassed way of his, sweeping out his arms.

"What can I say? I'm really popular."

From then on things flow, in an easy banter and exchange of meaningless conversation that leaves Shen Wei feeling like perhaps he'd waited his whole life for this, or all his lives, for this. No secrets, no pretense, no worries beyond writing a paper to turn in before midnight; just good food and Yunlan tilting his head onto Shen Wei's shoulder and having to hold his sides with giggles at some story being told at Shen Wei's expense through Ye Zun's expertly exaggerated expressions.

It's perfect. So perfect, he almost forgets they're not anything but people that have just met recently. That Yunlan doesn't know the history, the tragedy of their unfulfilled love.

It's probably better that way, Shen Wei wouldn't want anything weighing Yunlan down, adding on to the grief he probably already carried. Still, it's strange, climbing onto the back of Ye Zun's bike and watching Yunlan turn back to stare at him, something hard to understand in his gaze, something heavy with meaning Shen Wei can't ask about.

Though he wants to. He wants to reach out and grab those fingers and kiss every one of them until Yunlan's all he can taste past the drink still lingering on the tip of his tongue.

He raises a hand instead, waving a small goodbye. Yunlan's face lights up, starry and he makes a motion by his ears. 'Call me'.

Shen Wei flushes, ducks his face to hide a satisfied smile.

He thinks that maybe this time, it won't be too bad, going back to the start.

"Disgusting." Ye Zun comments, with more tenderness than he probably means to express.

"I can't help it. I want...I want it to work out this time."

"You two?"

He nods, silently. And Ye Zun grins, razor sharp. "We'll make it work. I'm on your side, and really, fate can't keep you pining for _ever_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this chapter. I barely had to edit it I was so satisfied. I hope everyone enjoys it as well! I'm happy I found time to finally post it. ;u;


	6. Flying Through Time

Watching Yunlan is like seeing the world in slow motion, blurred by early morning. 

He walks under the grove of trees with the shadows dancing on him, making Shen Wei have to squint behind his glasses, if only to pretend he's not as awestruck as he feels.   
He'd been strolling the grounds in that careless way of his, as if he had nowhere to be and all the time in the world, and as helpless as a magnet, Shen Wei had found his own feet dragging outside, tracing Yunlan's steps from a distance he'd deemed safe enough. He can almost hear Ye Zhun calling him a 'stalker' in his head.  
His chest feels like a torch when those eyes fall on him, going wide and pleased, so utterly pleased Shen Wei almost lets himself think he's loved, somehow.   
For a moment, there's a bit of guilt at acting like he's just as surprised to see Yunlan, acting as if he hadn't just been rather blatantly going after him like a bird going South.

"Shen Wei!"

Yunlan's lips sink on his name like on the very first day he'd imparted it on Shen Wei on a mountain top, too long ago to think about. 

"Shen Wei!" he waves, persistent even when Shen Wei's obviously seen him, having merely turned away out of embarrassment.   
He halts in his tracks, hesitates as Yunlan tells him to stop.

Yunlan has jogged up to him, eager. They're about the same height, though what Yunlan has in height, Shen Wei makes up for in presence, and Yunlan's head tilts, bird-like and fetching as he regards him.

"What's got you so distracted that you didn't say hi?"

"Nothing." Shen Wei says quickly, in order to not say 'you' like some shameless flirt. That was Yunlan's role, after all. 

Though this Yunlan was nowhere near as shameless as Shen Wei had expected, almost as if he hadn't quite finished putting on the mask he was made to use, as if he still wore a little part of him on his sleeve. 

"Nothing at all. What can I help you with?"

Yunlan parrots him with a disgruntled expression, rolling his eyes before settling unceremoniously on a nearby bench, patting the space next to him, legs sprawled with little regard to personal space or such things most humans thought about.

"There's nothing you can help me with! But if you're not doing anything, and I'm not doing anything..." he peeks up at Shen Wei, digs in his pocket for something and comes up with a packet of melon flavored gum, offering it out. "Gum?"

"No, thank you." Shen Wei watches him shrug, managing it despite his utterly despicable posture, chewing obnoxiously for a moment, before composing himself and going quiet, jaw working on the treat as he stares out aimlessly the same way he seemed to think Shen Wei had been doing.

"Sit," he pats the spot next to him again. "It's nice here."

Shen Wei sits, on command. Yunlan cuddles up to him, clearly pleased and he has to let out a long breath through his nose before answering.

"Yes. I like it." 

Yunlan grins, stretches his arms deviously and cat-like so they come to rest around Shen Wei's shoulder. "You like the place, or the company?"  
Shen Wei swallows, tries to remain impassive even as he feels himself go warm, glad that the chill of the weather already bit his cheeks a ruddy color, giving him a much needed cover. 

"I'm not an arm rest." he notes, dryly, though not extracting himself from Yunlan's grip, merely holding still under it. He couldn't trust himself to move. He couldn't trust himself to answer the teasing question either.

"Are you a head rest?" 

"No," Shen Wei replies, lips starting to twitch. 

Yunlan goes silent again, long enough that Shen Wei almost grows concerned. He makes a face he prays isn't as twisted up as it feels, patting his thigh awkwardly with his free hand. Yunlan grins, like he'd been aiming for such an invitation from the moment he'd sat down. Shen Wei wouldn't put it past him, though he didn't care enough to feel mad about it. 

Yunlan does a shimmy, sinking down with the scratching of fabric on wood, legs sticking out off the arm of the bench as he places his head on Shen Wei's thigh, his cheeks riding up like a steamed bun. 

"You're so cute." Shen Wei mumbles, before he can stop himself, his face heating up too quick and obvious to be blamed on the weather. Somehow, the sight of a matching blush slowly burning Yunlan's ears doesn't offer him much beyond a surge of overwhelming affection, as he brushes a finger over the fine skin there, hearing Yunlan's shuddered, small sigh echo loudly against the bustle of the University behind them. 

"Are you flirting with me?"

"N-no." Shen Wei chokes, quickly removing his hand. Yunlan makes an affronted noise of protest, reaches out blindly for it again, whacking Shen Wei's stomach and clavicle in the process. 

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Put it back."

Shen Wei wouldn't usually be caught dead expressing any form of physical affection in public, as it was, he could overlook acting proper if he could have Yunlan nestled so closely, just as he'd always wanted.  
His fingers end up carding into hair, playing with tresses and smoothing over scalp, too caught up in the startling reality of having Yunlan pliable and given to notice he was almost asleep.

"Yunlan, you shouldn't sleep here."

"Nonsense. You're here, you'll wake me up, won't you?"

"Yes, but-" Shen Wei tries to fish for a convincing argument, but out of the two of them, Zhao Yunlan had always been the one with the clever sentences on the tip of his tongue. 

"Is this bothering you?" Yunlan has turned to glance at him, serious. "I'll get up if it is. I was actually wandering around for a place to nap so I'll just go sleep in the library if it's-"

"It's not." Shen Wei says too quickly. "It's okay." 

Yunlan smiles; it's neither cheeky nor self assured, in fact, it's startlingly soft, sweet with tenderness that makes Shen Wei feel like he'll choke on thin air.

"You're a good friend, Shen Wei." he settles back, shutting his eyes. Shen Wei resumes the ministrations with Yunlan's hair, trying to not feel unnecessarily shy. "You'd be a really good boyfriend too."

He tacks on the last part mindlessly, unaware of how it affects Shen Wei's unprepared heart, unaware of the way blood rushes in his veins, and his head spins.

"I wish you had asked me to be your boyfriend."

Shen Wei's heart stops, picks back up again and trembles in his chest. "What?"

"Before we died. I wish you had asked me out." Yunlan pouts, but the depths of his eyes are sad. That lingering sadness that seemed to always be clouded by vague confusion. Though there were no doubts clouding them this time, only a solemn, sort of certainty.

"You...remembered?"

"Some of it. Most of it perhaps. I'm not sure." his eyes suddenly slide shut, and he rubs against them, tired, if his dark circles were any indication. "It comes and goes. I kept thinking it was a dream."

Shen Wei's mouth has stopped working around words, and Yunlan laughs, quiet. "It was painful."

"Why-" the air gets stuck in his throat. "Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I like you. I think I liked you even before I remembered who you were. And I'm probably not the same man from your memories, not really, but if-"

Shen Wei thinks about the fact that they've been hanging around each other for nearly four months with Yunlan's gaze always straying. He thinks about the fact that Ye Zhun is always texting Zhao Yunlan but Shen Wei hadn't once gathered the courage to text Yunlan back. He thinks about the fact that he'd always been a coward somehow, that if he missed this opportunity then perhaps he'd never have another. 

He thinks of what it must have taken Yunlan to confess everything like that, and his own confessions slips out of him in a burst of agony.

"I love you." Shen Wei says, before he can stop it, before he can regret it, before he can start second guessing himself. "I love you."   
He says again, when Yunlan blinks at him, clearly caught off guard. 

"Oh."

Shen Wei chuckles, and there are probably tears in his eyes, but there seem to be tears in Yunlan's eyes too, so it's not so bad. They're happy tears, anywhow. Tears of relief and joy, and thousands of other inexplicable feelings.

"So...you'll be my boyfriend then?"

"Of course." 

Zhao Yunlan beams, and his arms wrap around Shen Wei's neck as if he'd always been itching to do so, and for once in his life, Shen Wei allows himself to hug back, with no intention of letting go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it took so long. I don't even remember how many chapters I promised at this point but there were a few unedited things lying around and this was one of them and it felt like the perfect way to end the story. I didn't want to keep up the angst after the dinner scenes and a sudden confession happened while I was writing and I kind of loved it. RIP to Ye Zhun but Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan are in love. :') I thank everyone who has commented, given the story kudos and appreciated my little attempt at writing something for the TV series!

**Author's Note:**

> I want to thank everyone for all the comments! I may not reply usually (the system of replies on AO3 boggles me utterly) but they always make me so happy!


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